hmmm. i have been in one of those moods for the last few months, you know the kind. the kind where you think "i don't feel like dealing with people, nor do i feel like putting up with anyone's neurosis. i'm too busy dealing with my own". i have a lot of thoughts that i tend to keep to myself, mainly because i'm still trying to decipher them, and don't necessarily need anyone's input. with that said, i'm not depressed, just contemplative i guess. or something.

i really like this song, and this home made picture vid. kinda hits home. and YAY for delta goodrem. i really like her.

a friend was in a serious car accident - his van rolled numerous times after the rear tire blew, and he lacerated his head. they had to reattach his scalp to his skull and he was in ICU. another friend and i drove all the way to montana to see him in the hospital. we left thursday night and got to billings by mid day the next day. it really freaked me out, and i am so glad that no one was seriously hurt or killed. there were 4 others in the car including a 10 month old baby. his recovery was amazing and we brought him back to portland with us on our way home.

aside from that, montana was beautiful. or at least the western side. i really loved missoula.

i ran into someone i knew in billings. what are the chances, anyway? well, he lives there...but still !

OMG YESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!

today nick and i went on a really cool drive which entailed seeing new territory for me. we went through the olympic national park / olympic peninsula, washington. we headed up toward seattle but broke off from I-5 just below olympia and got on the 101. we followed that along the coast and then through forks, wa and then through this magnificent lake called lake crescent. it was fucking GORGEOUS. we ended up going through port angeles and then down into sequim and along the puget sound / hood canal back down to olympia. the drive was hella long and we are beat. we left around noon.....its 12:15 AM and we just got home. nick drove the entire time. i dozed off several times during the journey. car rides do that to me. seeing all the pretty scenery made me want to go camping and hiking and swimming. i want more!!!!


these are some pics of crescent lake i found on the internets. it was WAY more amazing (and HUGE) in person but i couldn't find my camera this morning. :( this lake i would say rivaled lake tahoe in beauty and was probably nearly half the size (which is still HUGE). it still took us quite a while to drive from one end of the lake to the other.




and this one is just a random one of the olympic national rain forest from the internets.

i could NOT stop laughing at this, especially toward the end. this is sooo funny. omg my stomach muscles are on the verge of cramping and i was crying toward the end. SOOOO adorable!

ni

i love these.

this is my song for winter of 2008 and into spring of 2009. it's just so soothing and melodic, it's hard to stop listening to it.

was just updating and tinkering around with my old macbook tonight and went through pictures. my god.

anyway, here are a few that i really like.

meeeemmmories..... la la la la la la laaaaaa

oh man, i am feeling just so happy and full of energy. it is that time of year. i have been looking forward to the warm spring and summer, i just can't wait. i feel like i have been in a coma for the last year or something. it's weird. lots of things will be changing for nick and i with our new place and all (we found a sweet apartment downtown today that we are presently chewing on).... there is such positive energy in the air. when i think of summer, i think of FUN. last summer was sorta blase....but this year will be different, i can feel it.

i am just so happy right now. YAY!

YAAAAY!

several weeks ago, i told nick that i predicted that the fleet would find THIS earth in the final episode.

score!

I WIN.

it has really been annoying to me lately, the way some guys behave. and i see it so much in the bear community just as much as anywhere else! first and foremost, other people are not toys to play with for your amusement! i see too many of you assholes out there treat people like toys: you get a new toy, play with it for a while...then it fizzles out and you put the toy away, back in the box and up on the shelf. days, weeks, or sometimes months or years go by, then you become interested in your toy again and take it off the shelf, dust off the box and take the toy out and play with it again.

rinse and repeat.

again...and again.

you fucktards. people are not toys and should not be treated as toys. get a life!

---

on a sidenote, please boys...please! if you are growing facial hair, please trim the hair above your lip. perhaps this is a personal displeasure, but it also really annoys me. don't let your lip hair get so long that you are chewing on them. it's gross. keep that shit trimmed. it just grosses me out when i see guys with flaring lip hair, especially when it gets all gross looking and food crusties stuck in there. UGH. gross. *PUKE*

manscape. that's all im sayin'. or something.

i feel really bad for all my old coworkers who were laid off last week. part of me wishes i was one of them, just so that i could have an excuse to go back to school full time, etc etc. but part of me is grateful to have a job. i just wonder what my old buds are going to be doing with their spare time. enjoying themselves i suppose and i know that most, though scared of having only an unemployment income, are happy to be out of that hell hole. the account is moving to another company being handled out of chicago. this new company is actually the company who offered me a job in st. louis ...wow, about 4 years ago -almost exactly.

several other coworkers who left my old company before the lay offs and went to another large insurance company in the local area are also getting laid off. their offices are consolidating and most of their work is moving to denver, co.

my heart goes out to all of them, some of whom have families to support. i just don't know how they are going to make it.

if i ever get laid off from my current job i will be so very happy and i will NOT get back into claims ever again.

on another note, classes are starting soon and i'm still debating on what to take. i will need to, at some point, purchase the adobe CS4 web package which will cost me a minuscule $500 in comparison to the $1500 retail value. with that said, i may just start out with an art class or two, or something to that effect.

here is a pick of me and some of the girls at my old company, celebrating my friend molly's birthday. i really miss them! and i'm not quite sure what's going on with my mouth in this pic:




and here is a pick of noodle, still in bed sleeping. he looked so cute!

wow, this is pretty cool! lots of time and years together shows.

i dont know why but i have been absolutely obsessed with this group, liberty x. i picked this song up off of itunes a month or so ago, knowing nothing about the artist. this song, in particular, sounds so late 80s/early 90s, i thought for sure it was just reproduced or something. but nope, this is the aftermath of the early 2000s pop phenomenon - british syle! i love this vid though, it's soooo "how stella got her groove back".



( and my other favorite vid is here )

damn. not much to write about really. life has been pretty bland lately and this week i have been sick with a bad cold. it was the first time i have been sick in almost a year so i guess i was due. i hate being sick, but at least it came on in the week and now i am feeling a little better for the weekend. always gotta see the positive, right? i consider these months to be "the calm before the storm". i think nick and i both are pretty excited to get out of this apartment - which will happen in MAY. i can't wait to move back into the city. but true to form, i am living and learning about myself. i thought maybe i could be okay in the burbs, but that is not the case.

after i tried out a different gym, nick and i finally made a decision and joined 24 hr fitness. we are getting a great deal through his work. we haven't gone yet though lol. but we did go shopping to get some work out clothes and such. i have put on a bit of weight over the last year and i think nick has put on a little too. we both have been complaining about it.

so i am motivated because i really intend to enjoy the summer a lot this year. i really didn't enjoy it too much this past year, not really sure why. i guess because neither of us really went out that much since we are stuck way out here in the burbs. and also we started playing WoW - that will doom ANYONE lol. i need a more active lifestyle, the one that i had before when i lived downtown...and i think nick does too. i miss my old neighborhood... A LOT.

anyway, i am really anxious to see what this year will bring. lots of changes in store for us. and i will be starting a class or two this next term at PCC. it's time for a career change. i'll probably talk more about that later when it happens.

wow, i found it. talk about a distant memory. this seems like ages ago, but in reality is was 9 years ago. i can't believe this is still out there. sometimes i think of trisha and wonder how her family and her babies are doing, and what kind of life they have. sad.

http://www.geocities.com/afbb2/trisha.html

and yes, that would be me in the middle.